You Hid I Seek ..

Call it prose, or a prose poem but it is rough for sure. Its more or less sort of a forced vent which had to be written and posted just for the sake of pouring out a random idea that lurked in my mind for a few days. Hope it isn’t offensive to those who expect better quality stuff from me.

When you hid behind a thick oak tree

in a childhood game of hide and seek,

that we played one dark eventide,

I never knew I’ll be rendered blind-folded

to grope for your touch for a lifetime to come.

You were abducted by time that plunders

in the ripe environs of swelling nights

as I bumped onto objects, muted and dumb,

hurting my heart which bled

leaving behind a trail of red

through the journey of passing years.

The map of my life is reminiscent to

the colors of the day of Valentine

which reminds me of the little

game of hide and seek that

we so fondly played in our childhood.


19 thoughts on “You Hid I Seek ..

  1. Pingback: You Hid I Seek .. | Tea Break

  2. Cavaliere

    Ohhh……. I love it ! Really !! πŸ™‚
    You didn’t disappoint me at least.

    “I never knew I’ll be rendered blind-folded

    to grope for your touch for a lifetime to come”.

    These lines are quotable !!

  3. @ Cavaliere … You didn’t disappoint me at all! πŸ˜‰ Shukrya .. buhut, buhut! πŸ™‚

    @ bliv_in_magic … Thanx for the comment! πŸ™‚ I wouldn’t like to be called a pain-monger though! πŸ˜‰

  4. bliv_in_magic

    pain monger?? nah.. colors hold a different ,a more beautiful place ina painter’s dt was jus a painter speakin hr heart out..never thot of red as a pain monger..dont wanna merge truth with beauty..n well, ignorance is bliss they say n indifference divine…

  5. Ayesha

    Aadil I think that’s a wonderful poem. And one should keep experimenting with ideas and styles.

    It gave me this haunting feeling when you said:

    When you hid behind a thick oak tree

    in a childhood game of hide and seek,

    that we played one dark eventide,

    I never knew I’ll be rendered blind-folded

    I could not only picture it but felt the unsettling feeling too. I think that’s the success of any writer/poet when he sends across his thoughts/feelings through words successfully.

  6. @ neilina … Thanks … I’m amazed at the generosity of you people .. I didn’t expect that πŸ™‚

    @ bliv_in_magic … I agree to what you’ve said … every color is a representation of an aspect of human nature and one can’t ignore its importance. Joke apart, pain could also be a bliss for it reminds us to realize one’s limits and be humble and considerate towards other beings. Thanks for your worthy feedback! πŸ™‚

    @ bigtugboat … You’ve guessed it right … the theme of this blog’s been changed sometimes back .. Welcome to my blog! πŸ™‚

    @ Nayni … Thank you so much! πŸ™‚

    @ Ayesha … I quite agree to what you’ve said about experimentation. This too was sort of an experiment with the length of lines unlike my usual stuff but I wasn’t sure whether I’d done it properly or not. I’m glad you liked the poem. So very thanks! πŸ™‚

  7. itswasim

    Hay adil,I just got free to come back to your blog world after an ages I really very appreciate your great peice of writings ,kiip it up

  8. @ wasim … Welcome back! Yes, its been ages since you came to my blog and I knew liabilities. I’m glad you showed up again. Thank you for the comment! πŸ™‚

  9. Asma Ahsan

    I like it – you know that all my poems are written like that as well – rough drafts! πŸ˜›

    The idea of it is so beautiful. The blind folded groping for the ideal in life – that is a really effective idea!

    Its very good and it touched me. Also the similarity to Valentine red with the red of a bleeding heart is very very effective!

  10. @ yesterdaywazbetter … Thank you πŸ™‚

    @ Asma Jee .. I very appreciate, your appreciation for the poem πŸ™‚ I know you write impressively with those longish lines πŸ™‚

      1. Are you saying it about the poem? I understood it… But I was talking about in “real” you should marry too..

        And about the pain, Hmm, I was around 14 I think and I wrote a terrible poem, in which I wrote ” I wish I had never witnessed, the joys of being kissed..” something like that and my dad read it πŸ˜€ imagine what he said when he read it, he thought it was based on true experience…hehe

        So I thought, that all this pain in your poems, there must be a “love” reason for it in reality too…

  11. Oh, really? I can imagine how would you’ve felt upon reading that poem by your dad; you’d be very clumsy then πŸ˜›

    Yep, this pain might have something to do with the reason of ‘love’ ; its lost and disappeared out the realms of my existence.

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